I Am Thankful!

These last few weeks at work have been stressful. It started with being told to take two unpaid days, followed by the message that it “would not impact patient care.” That line stung — it made me question my worth and motivation. Then came the layoffs, and now the move to another organization. It’s been a lot.

But tonight, I am thankful.

Today, I helped again with feeding the underprivileged. Being around people who volunteer to package food is always uplifting, but handing out the meals — that’s what really grounds me. It’s cold out there, and the snow hasn’t even started yet. Despite the chill, everyone was grateful for a warm lunch. We handed out 250 meals, and even that wasn’t enough. A fellow volunteer and I walked food to those who couldn’t come to us — some because of mobility issues, others because they were huddled in spots they couldn’t leave. And who could blame them?

Tonight, I’m thankful for a job that keeps a roof over my head, pays the bills, allows my family to stay together, and puts food in our bellies. I’m thankful for being under my duvet after a warm shower.

Today put everything back into perspective. Gratitude doesn’t erase hardship, but it reminds me that I still have so much — and that giving, even when we feel depleted, fills us back up.

The Journey Within – A Meditation Experience to Remember

Earlier this month, I attended a meditation seminar called “The Journey Within.” The evening began with a powerful opening by an Indigenous elder, who offered a prayer accompanied by the steady, grounding rhythm of his drum. I’ve always found that drum work moves me deeply—it connects me to something greater while simultaneously setting me free.

Then came Gurudev Sri Sri Ravi Shankar. It has been over 20 years since he last visited Edmonton, and being in his presence was both enlightening and humbling. He spoke about the importance of collective action—asking us how we were going to make a difference in the world, and how each of us can contribute to creating positive change.

Throughout the event, a group led us through beautiful meditations using chants and drumming, creating an atmosphere that was both serene and invigorating.

It was truly a unique and transformative experience—one that left me feeling grateful, centered, and inspired. I’m already looking forward to the next opportunity to “journey within.”

NUMBERS

Pushups (modified): 8928

Situps (modified):  6445

Sparring: 70

KMs: 1283

AOKs: 1173

Blogs: 30

Mastery byu Stuart Emery:  Incomplete

Relationship Mend Status:  Complete

Da Mu Hsing: 235

Weapon Form: 142

Germain: 4730

Meditation: 825

Tai Chi: 1153

Decluttering: 600

Yoga, Stretching, Exercise: 1200

Days of Zen: behind 

Getting Back on Track—One Board at a Time

The past few weeks haven’t been great, and my training has taken a hit. So what’s the best way to get back on track? Board breaking, of course!

Today was our breakathon—my second since the transplant. Last year, I was just happy to attend. This year, I wanted to do more. But I’m walking a fine line between what I want to do and what I should do.

Due to treatments, I now have moderate osteoporosis, which puts me at a medium risk of fractures. That’s actually an improvement—last year, it was high risk—thanks to medication. Still, I’m learning where I can safely push myself and how far.

This year, I used lighter rebreakable boards but increased the difficulty slightly if a technique felt strong. Some went really well, others… not so much. And seriously—why is my side heel still kicking smurfs? Someone tell my body the target is a little higher up!

But I ended the evening with an elbow break on a wooden board—and it went well. I was confident, my technique felt solid, and I stayed in control. It was more than a physical challenge—it was a personal one. And I showed up for it.

It wasn’t just about breaking boards—it was about proving to myself that I’m still growing, still pushing, and still capable. I can’t wait for next year!

Elusive Energy

I’ve written before about chasing the feeling of energy in Kung Fu — especially in Tai Chi. I used to think that once I could feel it more consistently, it would come more easily.

But no.

The only real difference now is that the gaps between those moments are getting smaller. I catch glimpses more often, but it still takes conscious effort.

“Focus on the energy coming from the ground.”
“Feel it around me.”
“Can I sense it moving through me?”
And now: “Can I move the energy?”

Oops. Lost it again.

And so the cycle continues.

If anyone has tips or insights on how to improve this skill, please let me know — I’d love to hear how others experience and develop this part of the practice.

NUMBERS

Pushups (modified): 8716

Situps (modified):  6345

Sparring: 67

KMs: 1198

AOKs: 1113

Blogs: 28

Mastery byu Stuart Emery:  Incomplete

Relationship Mend Status:  Complete

Da Mu Hsing: 227

Weapon Form: 140

Germain: 4455

Meditation: 685

Tai Chi: 1003

Decluttering: 540

Yoga, Stretching, Exercise: 1140

Days of Zen: behind 

Learning German, Learning Kung Fu: Similarities?

Starting something new as an adult—whether it’s learning a language or practicing a martial art—can feel overwhelming. Three weeks ago, despite my nerves and doubts, I took a leap and joined a beginner German class. What I didn’t expect was how much this experience would mirror my journey learning Kung Fu, teaching me valuable lessons about patience, immersion, and stepping beyond my comfort zone.

My 2.5-hour Monday classes, taught almost entirely in German, were intimidating at first—especially since the first 30 minutes covered the equivalent of 280 days of Duolingo practice! But slowly, I started to find my groove.

What’s helped most is letting go of the need to translate everything in real-time. Instead, I immerse myself in the language, even when I don’t fully understand it yet. I do my homework, give myself grace, and remind myself that learning takes time. We’re all figuring it out at our own pace.

This experience has reminded me so much of how I’ve been learning Kung Fu—and how I might have approached it differently from the start. Like with German, I used to overanalyze every movement, trying to “translate” instructions into instant understanding. But that mindset slowed me down. Now, I focus on being present in the practice, trusting that clarity will come through repetition.

It reemphasized how important it is to reinforce what I’ve learned outside of class—and to be patient with the process. Not everyone learns the same way or at the same speed, and that’s okay. That includes me.

Taking on German has reminded me that learning—whether a language or Kung Fu—isn’t about perfection, but persistence. I’ve learned to stop overthinking, to practice consistently, and to trust that understanding will come with time. Most importantly, I’ve been reminded to be kind—to myself and to others on the same path. Growth happens outside our comfort zones, and with effort and compassion, we can make surprising progress—even in intimidating spaces.

If you’re starting something new today, remember: it’s not about perfection. It’s about persistence, presence, and kindness to yourself along the way. Growth awaits just beyond the edge of your comfort zone.

NUMBERS

Pushups (modified): 8566

Situps (modified):  6095

Sparring: 66

KMs: 1181

AOKs: 1068

Blogs: 27

Mastery byu Stuart Emery:  Incomplete

Relationship Mend Status:  Complete

Da Mu Hsing: 227

Weapon Form: 140

Germain: 4455

Meditation: 685

Tai Chi: 953

Decluttering: 540

Yoga, Stretching, Exercise: 1080

Days of Zen: behind