Tiger Requirements

As I plan for the year of the Tiger requirements, I am finding these the hardest since joining the I Ho Chuan team.  I realize that I am not same person that started Kung Fu years ago, I am not the same person that started this year, nor am I the same person that woke up today.  My requirements are changing as I look deeper into the intent of what I am working to achieve as well as my potential to make these changes.  

One of the things on my list is learning to embrace my health issues.  I have lived with them, I have dealt with them, but my appointments were just hoops.  Things to check off to say "I'm fine, I'm conquering this" but chronic illnesses are not conquerable.  Diet, exercise, sleep, mental fortuity, meds, appointments and my medical team all play parts in keeping my illnesses controlled but I have not accepted the reality that these also make me who I am.  Accepting and embracing something is not a measurable requirement so I need to find tools to help obtain this. I am planning on using meditation and support groups but I also need to make sure these support my intent.

I am so appreciative for the successes and failures over the years as these have paved the path for where and who I am today.   As I look in the mirror tonight, I will thank the person that is there for she will be gone tomorrow yet she will always remain a part of me.  

See you on the mats!

Arggg!

We have been working on triangle stepping pattern this week and it is not flowing the way it should.  I thought it was because of my shoulder disrupting the middle of the form but as I was doing Lau Gar I noticed that my horse stance felt off.  No wonder my triangle stepping wasn’t flowing.  With more analysis (and videoing) I can see that I ALWAYS step forward on my horse stance so my feet are never aligned.  I thought I fixed that! WHY is it happening AGAIN!!! Arggg!!!!  I just want to cry!  

Okay, temper tantrum over.  I know I have a lot of work to do to fix this.  It was not cemented in before.  I have been trying to focus on flow and intent, was this wrong?  No, because it was during the practice of these that I noticed something not feeling right.  So now I need to find the right tool (starting with triangle stepping) to help me fix this and do REPS, REPS, REPS!

See you on the mats!

Out of Sync

 I was surprised how much I was knocked down after my surgery.  I knew I wouldn't be able to train for the week after but I thought I would be able to do all my mental activities but I couldn't even do those.  I also wasn't being honest with myself, I really thought I would be back to normal after the week off.  This is not the first time I have had procedures (nor the second, third or ...) but I continue to forget how much time you need to physically and mentally heal.  I did learn this time around NOT to go overboard and did ease myself back into a training so I wouldn't have a set back.  (I've had set backs before and it's even harder to recover from those.)  What really bothers me is that I have to DRAG myself to do any type of training.  It didn't help that I was not sleeping as I felt things starting to pile up as time ticked away, this made the next day even harder.  This cycle had to stop! So I am back to forms (still dragging myself to the mats but everyday will get better) and being happy with what I am doing, instead of worrying about what I am not doing.  

This is just a great example of when your expectations and reality are not in sync and how they can negatively impact your training and your life.  I am just happy to have the support to help me get back on track quickly.  

See you on the mats!  Tomorrow!!!

Removing Mediocrity

 Today I removed a number of apps that were not contributing to my path to mastery.  One was a game that I have been playing for years, yes years.  It was hard to delete something that I had invested so much time and money.  It was only a few minutes a day that I would use it but there was nothing that I was gaining.  It was not benefiting me in the slightest and I'm embarrassed to say that I knew I needed to remove it a long time ago but I just couldn't do it.  Today it was clear, mediocrity was me wasting precious minutes of my day doing nothing that had any benefit to me or to those around me.  Minutes that I will never get back.

Another app I deleted was one that I initially added when I was working to improve my memory (also a requirement for this year).  What happened was I lost the purpose of what I was trying to accomplish and found another addictive game and justified it as something that was satisfying my requirement.  I may have been needing to use logic to solve problems but it was something that I liked and was good at so I wasn't really going beyond my limits.  The best thing that has helped with improving my memory this year has been memorizing "Mastery".  At the beginning of the Ox year I did not even correlate the I Ho Chuan requirement as a tool for my personal requirement.  But like any tool, first you need to understand its application and then you actually need to use it properly.  It just took me some time to realize that there is more than one application for most tools.