Impact of Acts of Kindness

I noticed this week that there was a lot of media attention around “Acts of Kindness (AOK)” gone wrong. A women who bought a lunch for a man at McDonald's who she thought was only in there to stay warm, only to see his lunch arriving just as she dropped off one off. She was embarrassed and walked out. Someone paying for a hotel room for a homeless couple and then getting a big bill for damage.

There is something about doing an AOK anonymously. We might do that to remain anonymous, we might do it because we are shy, but sometimes it can also protect us from any embarrassment of an AOK gone wrong. Sometimes I find myself in the position of wanting to do an AOK but afraid that it will be misconstrued so then I miss out on an opportunity that will never be there again.

This summer, Simon had come to work with me and we stopped to get some snacks for the team meeting. While standing in line, an elderly lady ahead of us had a few groceries that you knew was her meal for the day. He leaned down and whispered in my ear “can we pay for her groceries Mom?” I explained to the teller that we would like to add her groceries to ours, and the teller got a big grin. It took some explaining to the elderly lady, but then she started to cry and was so thankful. She gave Simon such a big smile and he shyly smiled back. I was so very proud of him at that moment.
You will never know how an AOK will affect you until you try it. It continues to surprise me how an AOK affects me, but I cannot be doing an AOK for me. It’s a fine line wanting to do something nice for someone and doing it to make you feel good. Sometimes I have to stop and think “am I doing this for the right reason”.

I have not started recording AOK’s since the Monkey year has not yet started but that is going to change. I should not need a start date to journal AOKs or I am going to forget the little things that happen every day, and I know its going to take some time for it to become a routine, but you need to start somewhere.

Would you think that going to invite our driveway families to the Silent River Banquet could turn into an event that would affect me? I didn’t, until at one house when I knocked on the door and was immediately invited in. I could have stayed on the doorstep and did a quick invite and left, I am ashamed to admit that it even crossed my mind. Then I hesitated and remembered I am representing Silent River so I stepped through the door. I ended up having a wonderful conversation, I was shown pictures of all her grandchildren which she proudly displayed on her wall, she spoke of the health decline of her husband and how much he has changed, she showed me a picture of him when he was a handsome 21 year old, and then hugged me (honest Mr. Repay, I did not initiate that one first). She was so thankful for the invite since they do not get to go out much anymore. I was proud to represent Silent River Kung Fu and the Adopt a Driveway Program and I know I will stop in again. Here was a chance to build that personal relationship that Sifu Brinker is always asking us to do. Putting myself out there is a risk that I need to take even if it could end up leaving me a little embarrassed because you never know how the smallest gesture may affect someone’s day, even my own.





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